So recently I was helping someone move, we exchanged keys, I took some keys off and removed other keys; to get to the point I took the keys off my regular set for a facility we workout in. So the other night at workout class, I reach down to pull out the keys and sure enough they aren’t there. This is the first time in 2.5 years I forgot the keys. Now if you knew me from my past life, I lost keys, wallet and or phone just about every weekend. Now that responsibility has found me, it seems like I’m able to keep better track.
You know what was astonishing to me, no one complained, no one rolled their eyes, no one made rude (or smart) comments or was terribly upset even though I’m sure most were looking forward to another Tuesday night workout. Then I gave my head a shake for expecting negativity out of this group and realized this isn’t that kind of group. I rarely hear anything negative; in fact I’m not sure if I’m ever around more positive people. I find more inspiration from them throughout the day than from anyone or from anywhere else.
That wasn’t always the case though, at times I’ve had to personally take someone to the side and let them know we’re a supportive encouraging group, and we expect everyone to be on the same page with that. This isn’t my favorite thing to do, I’ve only had to do this a couple times but I’m willing to. Others that are negative come for a short time and find somewhere else to go, it’s almost like they know they can’t be negative around us so they don’t feel comfortable.
Not so long ago someone sent me a very negative email, this was after they volunteered their email; I offered a free ebook from my personal email account, I offered to answer any questions they may have, I thanked them for stopping by our table and sifted through literally hours of emails and asked for nothing in return. I thought about ignoring their response and moving on, but that wasn’t good enough for me. The truth is I was fuming (you may be too if you read it). I couldn’t accept that email so I let them know in a polite and professional manner. They responded with an apology.
See we accept negativity in our life. That’s hard to grasp but if we don’t squash it right away, then we accept it, if more comes than we’re welcoming more. We have choices in this life and I personally choose not to accept it. Course there will always be those people that come up, but if you let them/it know right away it won’t be accepted, not around here, then it goes away quickly and won’t come back.
What we don’t understand is, we encourage negativity; if we don’t say anything, if we don’t take any action (doesn’t always have to be words) we’re contributing to the negativity because we do nothing to stop it; we’re welcoming it. You can walk away, you can tell them, you can disassociate yourself, you can inform someone higher up (if it’s in happening in a work environment). There a tons of ways to refuse negativity in your life. First of all we need to understand negativity comes because we allow it and we even contribute to it. Once we figure out we attract it, then we can understand how to dismiss it.
We should all realize once we start to deny negativity in our life less and less will come; if we do nothing, if we accept it, even contribute to it, well then we’re part of the problem as well.